Airport Tears

Today, I said goodbye to my family and the majority of my belongings and I moved across the country. Saying goodbye to my loved ones was ridiculously hard. I’ve moved several times in the past, but this time around I’m much older and put together and the odds of this being a successful move are much higher than they were five years ago. When I moved across the country when I was 21, I was a complete mess: I had no job to move to, I had no money, and I had only 1 friend in that area (she was moving with me –and also jobless). We were in no condition to pick up and leave.

This time around, I’m actually relocating for work (and school –I’m a perpetual student).  I’m incredibly sad that I won’t see my family for quite some time, but I know I’m going to rock this change. I’ve been ready for a big change for quite some time.  Any who, I’m not writing today to talk about my move really.. I’m writing today, because I was a total bag of nuts at the airport today and I thought some of you beautiful creatures might get a kick out of it!

As I said I moved, and with moving comes LOADS of unexpected expenses. This job opportunity popped up sort of out the blue, too, so I wasn’t exactly financially prepared for any of this. I’ve spent the last two weeks (since accepting this job offer) being as stingy as possible. The term “counting pennies” does no justice to how stingy I’ve been. I even went as far as sending myself my books and “heavier” clothing items in the mail, to prevent paying that stupid “heavy luggage” fee at the airport. With that said, due to road construction and busy family members, I had to take a $50 cab ride to the airport. Just that cab ride was giving me a heart attack… ugh ……….then I got into the airport.

I did my own check-in and luggage tag nonsense, and then brought my bag to the counter to be weighed. At this point, I was feeling pretty good about myself, because I only packed work clothes and gym clothes –I was in the clear… or so I thought! My luggage ended up being 13 pounds overweight, so I attempted to disburse the weight among my two carry-ons. I weighed my bag a second time, and it was 6 pounds over. I was going to have to pay $100 for 6 lbs of clothes. When the Customer Service rep explained to me that I’d have to try again, she had me open my back to see what we could move around to help lighten it. This is when she discovered that I packed only light clothes and that I packed VERY well. She looked up at me, and I was sobbing, and saying “I’m moving. These are all works clothes. I just shipped everything heavy to myself to avoid this. I cannot pay $100 for 6 pounds of what’s probably just this extremely heavy suitcase.” She looked at me one more time, typed something into the computer, asked for my ID, and said “Bye bye now. And thank you for flying (insert airline)! ….now throw your purse in something. It’s okay if it’s sticking out; it just has to be in something. Good luck with your move!”

Obviously that just made me cry even more, and I spent the majority of my two-hour wait at the airport sobbing because that lady did something semi-shady to prevent me from paying $100 extra for 6 lbs of clothes, and I could not have been more shocked and grateful! So, thank you kind KIND stranger for doing whatever it was that you did to prevent this solo traveler from having an even bigger meltdown at the airport.

Side note: does anyone else ALWAYS get pulled aside by TSA? Without a doubt, I ALWAYS get chosen to go through that stupid x-ray thing, frisked, and tested for residue. I’m 5’3 and always wear dresses to the airport, and am almost always crying……….I can’t think of a less suspicious person.  Lol it must be the airport tears.

It’s been a while since we’ve reached out to show love and share stories. Life has been crazy for us all. I love and appreciate every reader and writer; this community is so full of support. From the WP, IG, and FB community…we feel the love!

Thank you for the continued support, guys!

To be continued,

 

B&B

Why Millennial Men Find Women Like Me Confusing

This actually made me laugh, because I give this friend shit constantly.

But to further explain the likely cause of his and most men’s confusion with women: he’s a millennial who enjoys casual dating. Not promiscuity, but actual dating. He’s definitely a gentleman (and is generally very wonderful) but he actually dates around for fun. Are there any women out there who enjoy that? ….Homies, that might be why you don’t understand women: most of us actually hate casual dating.

Let’s discuss casual dating in situations I’ve been in: we talk a lot, we like each other, we either have sex or just “fool around”, we do things together, we never get too “couple-y”,  I’m treated like I’m just “one of the boys”, and I always feel on edge and like I can’t relax. *There’s definitely ZERO type of commitment that provides any sense of security.

Now, I  can’t speak for all women, I can only speak for myself but casual dating has been nothing but bullshit for me.

As a result of being the anti-casual chick, I friend-zone all men who I know have no intention of actually dating me. I want love… the real kind. Not the romance that fades shortly after it begins, but the boring kind of love. The kind that provides comfort..the kind of comfort that makes a person feel at home with their counterpart. I like having a partner. I have no shame in that.

I’ve voiced this in the past to men I’ve “seen” and to friends, and it’s generally unacceptable for millennials to want a commitment. Men have genuinely been confused in the past when I refuse to take anything further and kick them out of my life, because they’re just not in a place where a relationship is feasible.

Well, gents of 2016, not all of us want a fuck or makeout buddy. Sorry that you all tend to find us confusing because of that.

Sincerely,

IncrediblySingleAndSlightlyAnnoyed

B&B

The Girl With The Lower Back Tattoo Is Changing The Game

amy-schumer-vogue-july-2016-01

Game changer Amy Schumer was picked to be the cover of Vogue recently, and her interview is so atypical Vogue that it’s basically giving me life. I love Amy; she has been my dream bestie since the first time I saw her stand-up. I love any woman who celebrates her truth. I relate so heavily to not only her journey, but to her comedy. I believe in talking about the uncomfortable stuff that people need to hear about.

“I wouldn’t know what motivates Tina Fey and Julia Louis-Dreyfus,” says Schumer when I bring this up. “This insatiable drive. I have it too. Sometimes I feel like they’re hustling, they want something, and they’re not going to stop until they get it, and they play the game. I am very into making up my own rules. Like, I don’t want to play the game and succeed at it. I want to redefine it. That’s the only way I can deal with it. Maybe that’s naive. ”   -What a great way to utilize comedic talent!

Her interview with Vogue really is game-changing. She talks about the era of the mean girl being over, and that people are becoming more honest and not accepting of meanness, she discusses her journey with her dad and how being comedic was a defense against difficulty through her childhood. And what we can all probably relate to, she talks about how confusing sex is when you’re young and how her perception of beauty warped her sense of self when she was young. I am in love with alllll of that. In true Amy fashion, it’s honest and hilarious.
Click Here to read the whole interview.

Enjoy, Friends! I loved this interview.

 

To be continued,

B&B

Kicking and Screaming 

Today in Podcasts You Should Be Obsessed With: Kicking and Screaming, brought to you by Jenna and Bodhi Elfman. 

There’s seriously nothing I love more than a couple that has been together for basically ever and they do nothing but keep it real.  

This is the time of Facebook and Instagram posts, declaring undying love for a soulmate. Well, I don’t know about any of yall, but I’ve never dated an actual unicorn…and I’ve also never done heroine, so the euphoria these people express towards their lovers just confuses the shit out of me. Real love, to me, is someone who chooses you daily, and can still say “God, you’re fucking annoying sometimes. Still love you though!” 

I love LOVE love watching their podcasts. Jenna Elfman will for ever be my favorite hippy queen; Dharma, and their relationship is REAL. They actually express their annoyances towards one another. 

Check out their podcast, Kicking and Screaming, where they talk life, sex, parenting, and the perils of trying to get to your flight on time when your kid has to take the biggest number two there ever was. 

B&B 

For Her, Forgotten

She quietly died in a room where no one had bothered to change the calendar in for five years.
It was a decision she had made a few months before but never found the courage to go through with. That was largely in part of her never being alone.

Before then, I had left her side only once. It was something I deeply regretted but learned to forget over time.

I knew how much it hurt, but she said, “The heart heals because it’s made to take chances.” That never made me feel better, but it did give me a reason to breathe.

But by and by, the air grew thin until we found ourselves struggling to find enough for the both of us again. Or maybe she was just choosing not to take her share.

Fearing suffocation, or perhaps embracing the outcome more than she thought possible, she secluded herself to a small box to keep her safe from me. Or so I thought.

As the days passed, I couldn’t bear the stinging absence of her lips on mine. I couldn’t stand the sight of her not standing next to me, or the feeling of my fingers being able to touch in the void that her’s once filled.

So I found her there, her heart not quite healed but unable to break ever again.

Her lifeless lips with no intention to ever touch mine; her limp body with no means of standing next to me; her fingers unable to place themselves in the void they once filled.

She quietly died in a room where no one had even bothered to change the calendar in for five years.

This 21 Day “Fix” Shit…

Chris P. Bacon now has her own “corner” on Basic&Bipolar. Find more of her thoughts under Food&Feelings in the main menu.

I would like to take this time to give you a little history on myself and why this section is titled “Food and Feelings.”  Apart from the fact that I love food and I have a ton of feelings that accompany my relationship to food, the struggle bus that I’ve been riding on has lasted much longer than 21 days, which they say can apparently “fix” my shit.

For the majority of my life I’ve been what some would call “curvy”.  I’m 5’4″ and  if  we’re putting numbers on things, at my best I’ve weighed around 140.  At my worst, my number has been around 180, which is the current mile marker my struggle bus is stopped at.  And over the past 3 years or so, my number has literally gone up and down in every which way between.  Currently, I have G boobies.  Yes, that is an actual size in the bra department.  On a positive note, I like to own that shit… and when people ask “what size ARE you???”  My response goes like this: “I’m a Gee.”  (Gee as in Gangsta – but no one has to know I mean it in that sense.)  But when it comes to the lower portion of my body.  I can’t remember the last time I fit into pants or shorts that were sized as a single digit.  I rock those 10s, 12s, 30s to 33s.  I get that butts are “in” now (side note to thank Kim K and Nikki…)  But in REALITY, because we all know their asses don’t live in our world, I’d have to be doing 100+ squats per day to get on their level.  Or just have a really good plastic surgeon.  And I really don’t have the time, energy, nor the money for that.  Anyways…

The hardest part for me has been finding that medium where I look and FEEL great, where I’m choosing healthy foods AND foods that fill my soul, where I’m being physically active AND getting my lazy in, and most importantly where I’m HAPPY with the choices I’m making.  I understand that any change you want to make in life all begins with the choice to do so.  However, its not as easy as flipping a light switch and it takes a lot longer than 21 Days to “Fix”.

-Chris P. Bacon

 

Chris P. Bacon

Hi.

I’m Chris P. Bacon.

The name is fitting, I’m sure you’ll come to understand. I’m a new contributor for B&B. Here I’ll be expressing my feelings, frustrations, highs, and lows surrounding my relationship with food.  All kinds of food.  The healthy kind of food.  The not so healthy kind of food.  The kind of food that not even running a 5k could make you forget about.  I’ve never run a 5k…but I highly doubt it would make me want to forget about pizza… or bacon.

Sometimes I’m a hard core dieter.  The kind of hard core dieter where cleanses are involved, pills, shakes, meal replacements, etc., you name it – I’ve probably tried it. Other times, I’m a binge eater.  A serious binge eater where its Chinese take out for dinner, fast food for lunch, and leftover cake from a relative’s birthday celebration for breakfast.

Don’t get me wrong- I’d love to see myself in something less than a size 12 in my life time.  But oh the struggle is real trying to find a place between happy and healthy when all I really want to do is eat macaroons.

I’m on this journey of balance.  But for now, you’ll hear me bitch about needing to run but wanting that burrito a little bit more.  I’ll get that six pack… one day.

-Chris P.